Gathering the pieces up after learning we were not pregnant has been difficult. Through it all, I have noticed some tender mercies that have helped us through this.
Work has been busy & stressful for both of us, which could be seen as a bad thing but really I think it has helped to keep my mind off of the sadness.
We were able to go to San Diego the day of finding out & were able to spend a lot of time together which was really nice. It was also just nice to be in a different environment & also to go to the beach, which always calms & refreshes me! One thing that was really difficult though was that we had a family dinner Sunday night & N's cousin & his wife came & announced to everyone that they were pregnant. That was really hard because we had been wishing so bad that it was us announcing we were pregnant. In moments like that I feel so sad & just wonder if we will ever be announcing that we are pregnant but I have faith & hope & Heavenly Father is always there to help me & hold me up.
I am so thankful for N's strength through this all. He has been with me & there for me through everything & I know it is such an amazing blessing having him for my husband. We have definitely grown closer together through this. I feel like we were close before but since going through this trial/experience, we have gained a closeness that is very special.
Working out has become my new thing to focus on. During the IUI's I was wanting to train for a half marathon & get in really good shape, but I was told to not work out other than yoga or walking every 2 weeks after each IUI. That was totally fine, I wanted to do everything I could to ensure that the procedure(s) would work but now I just really need something to focus my energy on & my goal is to start running again, train for a half marathon, & get in really good shape working out at the gym. I'm also going to continue to do yoga 1-2 times a week because I love the stretching & relaxation it brings!
Family- I am so thankful for my family. They are so sweet & always praying for us & rooting us on. We have family dinner every Sunday night & it is always the best & so fun to be able to visit with everyone & also have the best meal of the week!
The Gospel- I am so thankful for church & for my Heavenly Father & Jesus Christ. I know that I can always pray & that I am never truly alone. I am so thankful for the comfort this brings to me.