The most amazing thing happened yesterday. I knew that it was the day that I was able to take a pregnancy test. I have felt very hopeful this past month but I also feel like I guard myself so that I don't anticipate the results because it is too hard. Yesterday morning I woke up at 5 am & took a pregnancy test. I used a cheap one from Walmart that only cost a dollar. I set it above the toilet & then went to brush my teeth. About 2 minutes later I went to look at the test & felt my heart drop a little as it looked negative. Then I looked closer & there was the faintest little line. I could barely see it though & didn't know if I was imagining it or if it was too faint. Then it started to get a little bit darker, but still pretty faint. I woke Nate up saying, "I don't know what this is but there might be a little line.." He was all out of it since I woke him up. Then I looked again & there was definitely a distinct 2nd line. I started jumping up & down & the feeling was just unreal. Nate was excited but still a little out of it, trying to wake up & I think he also didn't want to get too excited in case it was a false positive. We said a prayer of thankfulness & then I had to get ready & go to work but I just couldn't help but smiling so big the whole morning & day. It just didn't feel real! After 3 1/2 years of heartache, about a hundred negative pregnancy tests, 3 IUI's, 2 surgeries, thousands & thousands of dollars that are all worth it now, & many, many doctor's appointments, blood draws, & shots, we are finally pregnant!!! We never lost hope but there were some incredibly sad & difficult times.
After work, I stopped at the store to get a more expensive pregnancy test just to make sure it was real. The lady at the check out said, "do you want it to be?" & I didn't understand what she meant so she repeated it again, "do you want it to be?", pointing to the pregnancy test. I said "Yes!!!" so happily & she just smiled really big & asked if it would be my first child, which I said yes. I was just so happy to be buying a pregnancy test that would actually come back positive. I have gone through so many checkouts buying pregnancy tests only to have them bring so much sorrow but this was different.
At home I took the Clearblue test & it quickly came back with a + sign for positive. I am never throwing those test away! Then I went to the kitchen to cut some bibs for my sister (she donates them to a hospital). Nate got home about an hour later & was all panicked. He had texted to ask if I had taken the 2nd test & I hadn't answered back since my phone was in the bedroom. He was so stressed thinking it must have come back negative & that I was probably crying by myself. I quickly showed him the 2nd positive test & he was so happy! We were both so excited & happy & it just felt unreal to finally have this happen to us! We made a Plated dinner together that was fun to make & turned out sooo good! It was roasted chicken with a lemon sauce, parsnips & onion, & roasted potatoes. Nate had picked up a bottle of French Berry Lemonade at Trader Joe's so we had a fancy dinner to celebrate.
We had thought about if we should wait to tell family members of just tell everyone. Nate said he was too excited to wait & I was too, so we decided to tell all of my family that night & then to surprise his family when we see them in Utah this Friday. His mom doesn't have any grandchildren & has been wishing for some for sooo long so she is going to be sooo excited! I called my sister, Brittany, first. She has been trying to get pregnant for about 2 or 2 1/2 years & I just wanted her to be the first one to know so she wouldn't feel sad if everyone else knew. I was so nervous to tell her because I didn't want her to feel sad, but she was so sweet & so excited. The first thing she asked was if she can film my labor & make a video for me, haha! She is the sweetest! I was so happy that she was happy for us & I have always felt like we would both have kids at the same time so I hope she will be pregnant really soon & am praying for her every day! Then Nate & I went to drop the bibs off at my sister, Brooke's house. When I was setting them down on the table she showed my this super cute little pink bib she had made & I said, "I'm going to have to have you make one of these for me.." She looked at me all funny, trying to figure out what I was saying & then I told her, "I'm pregnant!!" She started screaming & jumping up & down & then we yelled & told Cody & the boys! It was so surreal! I always imagined how I would tell everyone & how I would let Nate know & I thought of all these creative ideas but we have been trying for so long that I was just too excited & just wanted to tell everyone the news!
Next we called Ryan & Christina, Nate's brother & his wife, & told them. They have been trying to get pregnant for about a year so Nate wanted to let them know before the rest of his family ( we will surprise his sisters & mom & dad on Friday). They were really happy too! Then my mom finally called back, I had been trying to call her for like 2 hours! I said that I wanted to Facetime & she didn't want to because she didn't have any makeup on, but I called her on Facetime anyways & she got my dad. Then we told my mom & dad & they were sooo excited! My mom started working at the temple about a month ago & she had felt prompted that we would be blessed because of that & that we would be able to have children. What a miracle for us to get pregnant just a month later! We feel so blessed! Then we called Ally & Zach & told them! It was so fun telling everyone & having everyone so excited for us! It still just felt so surreal!!!
We went to bed so excited & both woke up at about 4am, not able to fall back asleep! I just feel so happy & so incredibly blessed. My heart goes out to all those who are dealing with infertility because at the time it is so incredibly difficult & you want nothing more than to get pregnant. One of the hardest parts is not knowing when or if you will get that positive test. There is no way to know the feeling unless you are going through it. I am thankful that I never gave up hope & that I had faith, even though at times it was incredibly hard. I am thankful for my Heavenly Father for watching out for me, helping me through the hardest of times, & for blessing Nate & I to get pregnant against all odds. I feel so loved.